Pregnancy Over 40 / Lloyd

In our earlier posting, The Law of Sarah -- Option B, we noted:

Today, as the Lord hastens his work in a darkening and dangerous world the need is more critical than ever for faithful women to bring children into the world and nurture them in the faith, righteousness, and courage.

The mothers of the stripling warriors had demonstrated remarkable faith in their own lives. The women were among the CONVERTED Lamanites who made a covenant to never take up arms even in their defense rather than risk a return to shedding innocent blood and the eternal loss of forgiveness.

 
And God tested that resolve when the CONVERTED community prostrated selves on the ground and their enemy slew over a 1000 of them where they lay. These surviving tried and tested mothers understood that resolve and desire to obey are weighed by level of sacrifice.

Now when the people saw that they were coming against them they went out to meet them, and prostrated themselves before them to the earth, and began to call on the name of the Lord; and thus they were in this attitude when the Lamanites began to fall upon them, and began to slay them with the sword.

And thus without meeting any resistance, they did slay a thousand and five of them; and we know that they are blessed, for they have gone to dwell with their God.

Now when the Lamanites saw that their brethren would not flee from the sword, neither would they turn aside to the right hand or to the left, but that they would lie down and perish, and praised God even in the very act of perishing under the sword—

Now when the Lamanites saw this they did forbear from slaying them; and there were many whose hearts had swollen in them for those of their brethren who had fallen under the sword, for they repented of the things which they had done.

And it came to pass that they threw down their weapons of war, and they would not take them again, for they were stung for the murders which they had committed; and they came down even as their brethren, relying upon the mercies of those whose arms were lifted to slay them. (Alma 24:21-25)

 

Judy and I have decided that if ever there were women who demonstrated faith like the mothers of those stripling warriors, it would be faithful women who DESIRE children so much they would be WILLING to accept pregnancy and motherhood late in life -- even beginning in their 40's. This is true both for women who undertake live birth and those who battle for adoption.

These would be seasoned women who could coach their children in living true values. Judy and I recently found a Wikipedia article entitled Pregnancy Over 50. And all such women of record are listed. Overall, there aren't many on the list. 

How would the Lord approach an older couple about having children late in life, especially those who thought they already had their family or who were never able to have children themselves? Could that not be occasion for having one's Calling and Election Made Sure and a renewal of their bodies - the Lord selectively adjusting the laws that affect fertility and interceding for them to have the energy and ability to raise those children?

Surely husbands would need such a heavenly endowment to be able to support their wives emotionally and provide for them materially. It would require a level of faith and consecration practically commensurate to that of their wives.

Redirecting from polarizing politics to what matters most / Lloyd

Judy and I wrote "She Says, He Says" from 2008 to 2017 with the intention of passing on lessons learned to our children with their growing families. That effort ended with the 2016 election. We got sidetracked by politics, the pandemic, and war.

Now that our grandchildren are marrying and beginning their own families, we’ve decided to refocus our posts on this blog and on social media posts to family issues.

In that process I took time to read and consider the 334 posts that started in Oct 2008, when we began "She Says, He Says," and to a degree I relived our documented challenges and concerns. Although a lot has changed in our world, having children and raising them continues to have a recognizable structure.

For Judy and me family life takes center stage. Deciding when to have children (Have a Baby - posted 5 Apr 2015), what constitutes successful day-to-day life (Women Are Powerful -- We Create the Culture - posted 17 Oct 2016), and how to help little children take responsibility for their lives, beginning with issues like staying in bed and getting to sleep at night (Solving Bedtime Problems - posted 12 Jan 2016) is the nitty-gritty of developing families. It's what matters most right now.

So now Judy and I will restart "She Says, He Says", which has been sitting idle since January 2017). In our Facebook posts we will reference the longer posts in "She Says, He Says" because they are more appropriate to a blog.

It is true that this blog already has many past political posts, which are what sidetracked us from what matters most in the first place. But from here on our focus will be more on family life.

What Motivated Joseph Smith, Jr.'s Prayer? / Lloyd

Today was the first Sunday of 2017, and this year the Church-wide curriculum focuses on the Doctrine and Covenants.

The Doctrine and Covenants is one of the standard works of the Church in company with the Holy Bible, the Book of Mormon, and the Pearl of Great Price.  It is a collection of divine revelations and inspired declarations given of God through His chosen prophets for the restoration of His holy work and the establishment of the kingdom of God on the earth in these last days preparatory to His Second Coming. See Introduction.

I teach boys between 8 and 12 years old, so it’s a time to establish fundamentals -- building on their parents’ teaching and example at home and early Primary instruction starting from age 3 to age 8.

The first question is what motivated Joseph Smith, Jr’s (a boy about 14 and a half) prayer to God in the early Spring of 1820?

The answer that seemed to be the most motivating was that since age twelve, when he started attending meetings at various churches and seriously reading the Bible, Joseph came to believe he was not in harmony with God and he wanted to know how he could be forgiven.

However, when he looked to where he could go to find peace and assurance, the existing strife between churches, preachers, and sect members seemed so discordant to Joseph, he couldn’t see how any of them represented a way to the peace of mind that he sought.

Ultimately, Joseph’s visiting, reading and discussions led him to believe that Heavenly Father would show him mercy and guide him to a church that would help him.

But most important of all, Joseph Smith, Jr.’s search became intensely and personally earnest and worthy of the Spirit's confirmation and assurance when he became convinced that he needed to be right with God and believed that God would respond positively to his personal prayer for help.

It’s likely that like young Joseph Smith, Jr., many adults have felt a sore need to importune God for direction, intervention, and perhaps forgiveness and relief. And today we can build on young Joseph’s experience.

Why Our Family Pays Tithes and Offerings / Lloyd

It’s the end of the year and families, including children, in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints meet with their Bishop for annual tithing settlement.

Beforehand the ward (congregation) financial clerk provided us with a record of our contributions that year, which include tithing and freewill offerings in addition to tithing such as fast offerings for the poor, humanitarian offerings, and support of young men and women serving two-year proselyting missions.  Families come to tithing settlement having reconciled their records of contributions with Church records. Any differences are researched and corrected.

But the most important purpose of tithing settlement is our annual declaration to the Bishop that we are either full tithe payers, partial tithe payers, or paid no tithing at all. A full tithing is 10% of our annual increase. Our parents taught that we pay 10% of our gross earnings before any deductions. Other families may read that differently, but that is not at issue in our declaration to the Bishop. We declare that we have paid a full tithing that year or less.

Paying a full tithing is one requirement for worthiness to receive authorization from the Bishop to enter the Temple and participate in the most sacred ordinances of the Gospel: including marriage for time and eternity, and proxy baptism and other ordinances for our kindred dead which must be performed in mortality.

Reflecting on tithing, Elder Jeffrey R. Holland outlined reasons for paying tithing, which Judy and I can attest to after 49 years of marriage, raising our children, and paying our tithes and offerings. (Holland, “Like a Watered Garden,” January 2002)

ONE -- We pay our tithing to rightfully claim the blessings promised those who do so. “Prove me now herewith, saith the Lord of Hosts, if I will not open you the windows of heaven, and pour you out a blessing, that there shall not be room enough to receive it.” (Malachi 3:10-11)

TWO -- We pay our tithing as a declaration that possession of material goods and the accumulation of worldly wealth are not the uppermost goals of your existence.

As one young husband and father, living on a student budget, recently told me, “Perhaps our most pivotal moments as Latter-day Saints come when we have to swim directly against the current of the culture in which we live. Tithing provides just such a moment.

Living in a world that emphasizes material acquisition and cultivates distrust for anyone or anything that has designs on our money, we shed that self-absorption to give freely, trustingly, and generously. By this act, we say—indeed—we are different, that we are God’s peculiar people. In a society that tells us money is our most important asset, we declare emphatically it is not.”

THREE -- We pay our tithes and offerings out of honesty and integrity because they are God’s rightful due. Surely one of the most piercing lines in all of scripture is Jehovah’s thundering inquiry, “Will a man rob God?” And we ask, “Wherein have we robbed thee?” He answers, “In tithes and offerings.”(Malachi 3:8-9)  Paying tithing is not a token gift we are somehow charitably bestowing upon God. Paying tithing is discharging a debt.

FOUR -- We pay our tithes and offerings as a personal expression of love to a generous and merciful Father in Heaven. Through His grace God has dealt bread to the hungry and clothing to the poor. At various times in our lives that will include all of us, either temporally or spiritually speaking.

The Terrible Plight of Wealthy North America / Lloyd

 Having seen great poverty in other countries, I understand that in comparison the majority of men and women in this country are unbelievably wealthy -- no matter what we ourselves think.

Thus this scripture potentially applies nationwide:  

16 Wo unto you rich men, that will not give your substance to the poor, for your riches will canker your souls; and this shall be your lamentation in the day of visitation, and of judgment, and of indignation: The harvest is past, the summer is ended, and my soul is not saved! (Doctrine & Covenants 56:16)

The Consecration and Stewardship of Property is dramatically documented in the New Testament. First, consider this account of the Rich Ruler in Luke 18:18-26:

18 And a certain ruler asked him, saying, Good Master, what shall I do to inherit eternal life? . . .

20 Thou knowest the commandments, Do not commit adultery, Do not kill, Do not steal, Do not bear false witness, Honour thy father and thy mother.

21 And he said, All these have I kept from my youth up.

22 Now when Jesus heard these things, he said unto him, Yet lackest thou one thing: sell all that thou hast, and distribute unto the poor, and thou shalt have treasure in heaven: and come, follow me.

23 And when he heard this, he was very sorrowful: for he was very rich.

24 And when Jesus saw that he was very sorrowful, he said, How hardly shall they that have riches enter into the kingdom of God!

25 For it is easier for a camel to go through a needle’s eye, than for a rich man to enter into the kingdom of God.

26 And they that heard it said, Who then can be saved?

Second, I recently recognized that the account of the Rich Ruler was preface, or foreshadowing, and the key to understanding “voluntarily having all things in common” as administered by the Apostles in the primitive Church of Jesus Christ. The importance of authentic and honest, voluntary agency is dramatically illustrated in this account of the Apostle Peter, Ananias, and Sapphira (Acts: 1-11). Entrance into covenants with God is voluntary. But once under covenant, He holds us accountable, and penalties apply.

1 But a certain man named Ananias, with Sapphira his wife, sold a possession,

2 And kept back part of the price, his wife also being privy to it, and brought a certain part, and laid it at the apostles’ feet.

3 But Peter said, Ananias, why hath Satan filled thine heart to lie to the Holy Ghost, and to keep back part of the price of the land?

4 Whiles it remained, was it not thine own? and after it was sold, was it not in thine own power? why hast thou conceived this thing in thine heart? thou hast not lied unto men, but unto God.

5 And Ananias hearing these words fell down, and gave up the ghost: and great fear came on all them that heard these things.

6 And the young men arose, wound him up, and carried him out, and buried him.

7 And it was about the space of three hours after, when his wife, not knowing what was done, came in.

8 And Peter answered unto her, Tell me whether ye sold the land for so much? And she said, Yea, for so much.

9 Then Peter said unto her, How is it that ye have agreed together to tempt the Spirit of the Lord? behold, the feet of them which have buried thy husband are at the door, and shall carry thee out.

10 Then fell she down straightway at his feet, and yielded up the ghost: and the young men came in, and found her dead, and, carrying her forth, buried her by her husband.

11 And great fear came upon all the church, and upon as many as heard these things.

Finally, compare these New Testament accounts of having all things in common with the Doctrine and Covenants.  Living the Law of Consecration and stewardship of property was attempted in the Church but temporarily modified until we increase in love for others and in faith and love for Jesus Christ to fully live the law of the Zion and of the Celestial Kingdom:

29 If thou lovest me thou shalt serve me and keep all my commandments.

30 And behold, thou wilt remember the poor, and consecrate of thy properties for their support that which thou hast to impart unto them, with a covenant and a deed which cannot be broken.

31 And inasmuch as ye impart of your substance unto the poor, ye will do it unto me; and they shall be laid before the bishop of my church and his counselors, two of the elders, or high priests, such as he shall appoint or has appointed and set apart for that purpose.

32 And it shall come to pass, that after they are laid before the bishop of my church, and after that he has received these testimonies concerning the consecration of the properties of my church, that they cannot be taken from the church, agreeable to my commandments, every man shall be made accountable unto me, a steward over his own property, or that which he has received by consecration, as much as is sufficient for himself and family.

33 And again, if there shall be properties in the hands of the church, or any individuals of it, more than is necessary for their support after this first consecration, which is a residue to be consecrated unto the bishop, it shall be kept to administer to those who have not, from time to time, that every man who has need may be amply supplied and receive according to his wants.

34 Therefore, the residue shall be kept in my storehouse, to administer to the poor and the needy, as shall be appointed by the high council of the church, and the bishop and his council; (D&C 42: 29-34)

When we consider the current enmity towards war refugees and toward undocumented families in our country, we're reminded of an incident when the United States refused protection and succor to Jewish refugees fleeing the Third Reich.  

“On 13 May 1939, more than 900 Jews fled Germany aboard a luxury cruise liner, the SS St Louis. They hoped to reach Cuba and then travel to the US - but were turned away in Havana.

“The captain then steered the St Louis towards the Florida coast, but the US authorities also refused it the right to dock, despite direct appeals to President Franklin Roosevelt. Granston thinks he too was worried about the potential flood of migrants.

“They were forced to return to Europe, where more than 250 were killed by the Nazis.” (https://goo.gl/lNqOA7)

“Wo unto [us], rich men, that [judge unrighteous judgement and] will not give our substance to [those in desperate need], for our riches will canker our souls; and this shall be our lamentation in the day of visitation, and of judgment, and of indignation: The harvest is past, the summer is ended, and my soul is not saved!”

America's Pride: Selfish Rich and Greedy Poor / Lloyd

In successive years members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints place study emphasis on a canonical book of scripture: the Old Testament, New Testament, Book of Mormon, or Doctrine and Covenants.

In 2016  The Book of Mormon: Another Testament of Jesus Christ was the year’s course of study. We learned that Pride was the deadly Disease that caused the denial of Jesus Christ and consequent total destruction of the Nephite and Jaredite Civilizations in Ancient America.

In 2017 The Doctrine and Covenants will be the year’s course of study. And unlike the historical and distinctive cultural perspectives of the Bible and Book of Mormon this study will be uncomfortably close to home. We will study the destructiveness of Pride in modern North American Culture.

Over and over again we will confront the corrosive and dysfunctional symptoms of Pride: the Greedy Rich and the Selfish Poor. Both factions were abundantly evident in this past election. (https://goo.gl/HveNmf)

The Selfish Rich

16 Wo unto you rich men, that will not give your substance to the poor, for your riches will canker your souls; and this shall be your lamentation in the day of visitation, and of judgment, and of indignation: The harvest is past, the summer is ended, and my soul is not saved!

The Greedy Poor

17 Wo unto you poor men, whose hearts are not broken, whose spirits are not contrite, and whose bellies are not satisfied, and whose hands are not stayed from laying hold upon other men’s goods, whose eyes are full of greediness, and who will not labor with your own hands!

Mr. Trump, Put Me on Your List! / Joshua Abbott

There is a real possibility that on Tuesday Donald Trump will be elected the next President of the United States. As I’ve argued here, here, and here, this is the closest Americans have ever come to electing to our highest office a demagogue who, by definition, seeks power "by arousing the emotions, passions, and prejudices of the people."

Of all the "emotions, passions, and prejudices," Trump has shown a particular genius for arousing fear. He exploits our fears of terrorism, crime, immigration, impacts from trade, and dishonesty in the media. He evokes fears of racism, misogyny, nativism, and religious persecution. If FDR was correct that "the one thing we have to fear is fear itself," then Trump has proven to be the latter-day prophet of fear.

• “First they came for the Socialists, and I did not speak out—Because I was not a Socialist.

• Then they came for the Trade Unionists, and I did not speak out—Because I was not a Trade Unionist.

• Then they came for the Jews, and I did not speak out—Because I was not a Jew.

• Then they came for me—and there was no one left to speak for me.”

When you deport the millions of Americans who are undocumented immigrants, deport me too—because today, I am an undocumented immigrant. #PutMeOnYourList

When you force Muslims to register on a national database, add my name—because today, I am a Muslim. #PutMeOnYourList

When you "take out [the] families" of terrorists, be sure to target me as well—because today, I am the family member of a terrorist. #PutMeOnYourList

When you order the torture of suspected terrorists, order my torture too—because today, I am a suspected terrorist. #PutMeOnYourList

To those who agree, please share this message and vote to show that Americans will not be intimidated or afraid because we know that "perfect love casteth out fear."

If Trumpism continues to prosper beyond the election, it may yet usher in a climate of fear unknown since 1930s Europe. As one writer has observed, "frightened people do frightening things." A Lutheran pastor who lived during that time and ended up in a concentration camp, warned what can happen when we take counsel from our fears:

The lesson of history is clear: when anyone's rights are threatened because of race, religion, ethnicity, or belief, the rights of all are threatened. The only way to defeat such threats is to speak out in solidarity. And so, Mr. Trump, I have one demand: Put me on your list!

Donald Trump, the Law of Chastity and the Atonement / Lloyd

Donald Trump’s profligate violation and disdain for marital chastity and consequent dishonor to God is the showstopper for me. Let me explain.

I have come to understand that the very Atonement of Jesus Christ is necessary because our Heavenly Father offered his children to progress from 1) Their state of individual spiritual men and women without physical bodies, dwelling in God’s presence to 2) The state of eternal husbands and wives with immortal physical bodies, again dwelling in God’s presence.

For that to happen he revealed to his spiritual children -- to all of us -- his Plan of Happiness, wherein he would create an earth, place his children on it in physical bodies made from the elements of earth, and test us to see whether we would obey his commandments and thereby qualify to return to his presence and continue to live as family, but with the privilege of having children of our own. After all, we are his children, children of Heavenly Parents -- who are themselves male and female.

It's my understanding that God provided Adam and Eve physical bodies the way we ourselves provide bodies for his spiritual children, our spiritual brothers and sister. That Heavenly parents, came to this earth, ate and drank food created from the elements of this earth, and created Adam and Eve in the same manner as we ourselves create children -- providing spiritual beings with physical bodies.

When Adam and Eve elected to disobey Heavenly Father and eat fruit that he forbade to eat, they transformed from immortal beings to mortal, subject to physical death -- the separation of physical body and spirit.  However, their transgression enabled them to obey the more important of Heavenly Father’s commandments to multiply and replenish the earth -- and that was the choice they wrestled with before disobeying His law. Thus the process of mortality began for the spiritual children of Heavenly Father. And we are the result.

I believe that not only are we spiritual children of God before entering mortality, our physical bodies also descend from God beginning with Adam and Eve. Although we are the race of God, we are in mortality with very limited capabilities to see if we will qualify to live the life of God, continuing to have children in eternity, or to be relegated to immortal life without children and recognized family bonds.  

We don’t require the super physical and intellectual capabilities that myth and fantasy would portray for children of God. In mortality our focus, the focus of the sons and daughters of God, is obedience to our Father’s law, and that requires sacrifice of our will and wants to conform to God’s will and wants for his children.

When we recognize the essential union of Heavenly Parents to create spiritual children and our opportunity as parents to provide mortal, physical bodies for God’s spiritual children on earth, only then do we fully appreciate the eternal importance and centrality of God’s Law of Chastity: Wherein the daughters of Eve and the sons of Adam have no sexual relations except with their husbands and wives with whom they are both legally (law of men) and lawfully (law of God) married. Our Heavenly Parents are not pagan gods -- prone to every kind of whim and debauchery that myth depicts of deities.  

From the beginning it was fully expected that in mortality we would learn from our experiences and choices including transgression of God’s laws. With the transgression of Adam and Even we are separated from the immediate presence of God in mortality.

Thus, even before the earth was created provisions were made for a Savior to atone and mediate the effects of sin -- separation from the presence of God and physical death. Jesus Christ -- initially a spiritual child of God with us makes it possible not only for fallen mortal men and women to overcome physical death through the resurrection but also to overcome spiritual death and return to the presence of our Heavenly Parents.

The difference between Adam and Jesus Christ, is that our Heavenly Father was the father to Adam when he was yet immortal, but to Jesus Christ in mortality. Accordingly, Jesus Christ became God’s only begotten in mortal flesh and thus endowed with godly capability to function as the Redeemer of all mortal men and women. When we live in accordance to the laws and ordinances of the Gospel of Jesus Christ -- we are saved from our sins.

Donald Trump’s profligate violation, verbal disdain, and continued unrepentant attitude toward marital chastity dishonors our Heavenly Father’s purposes for the creation of earth and our mortal probation and Jesus Christ’s Atonement to bring us back to the presence of Heavenly Parents. That is the showstopper for me in voting for him. Has any other candidate for President of the United States been so openly crass and disrespectful of women and family. Voting for him is voting for that. Who would do that?

Great Leaders Build Bridges,Tear Down Walls / Joshua Abbott

One could reasonably ask, "What if there really is a dangerous crisis; and our leaders really are corrupt, weak, or incompetent; and we really do need a strong leader? Shouldn't a candidate who points out those realities be considered honest and courageous, instead of a wanna-be dictator?" Possibly. If those conditions are real, then saying so may not differentiate a demagogue from a good leader.

The difference is what they propose to do about it. Fortunately, we have both good and bad historical examples to help us learn to discern. A great leader confronts challenges by building others up, emphasizing unity and shared values, appealing to our virtues (love, patience, humility), and reinforcing our commitment to fundamental principles of freedom and equality. A despot tears others down, emphasizes our differences to stir up contention (rich vs. poor, women vs. men, christian vs. muslim), cultivates a cult of personality around himself, appeals to our baser instincts (fear, greed, hate), and sacrifices fundamental values for political and economic gain.

Compare how past leaders faced crises to Trump's approach:

"We are not enemies, but friends. We must not be enemies. Though passion may have strained it must not break our bonds of affection. The mystic chords of memory . . . will yet swell the chorus of the Union, when again touched, as surely they will be, by the better angels of our nature." (Lincoln, First Inaugural Address)

"[T]he only thing we have to fear is fear itself—nameless, unreasoning, unjustified terror which paralyzes needed efforts to convert retreat into advance." (FDR, First Inaugural Address)

"The energy, the faith, the devotion which we bring to this endeavor will light our country and all who serve it--and the glow from that fire can truly light the world. And so, my fellow Americans: ask not what your country can do for you--ask what you can do for your country." (JFK, inaugural address)

"We welcome change and openness; for we believe that freedom and security go together, that the advance of human liberty can only strengthen the cause of world peace. . . . Mr. Gorbachev, tear down this wall!" (Reagan, Berlin, 1987)

And now, Trump:

"The U.S. has become a dumping ground for everybody else's problems. . . . When Mexico sends its people, they're not sending their best. . . . They're bringing drugs. They're bringing crime. They're rapists. And some, I assume, are good people." (speech announcing candidacy, 2015)

"The most important difference between our plan and that of our opponents, is that our plan will put America First. Americanism, not globalism, will be our credo." (convention speech, 2016)

"I will build a great, great wall on our southern border, and I will make Mexico pay for that wall. Mark my words." (speech announcing candidacy, 2015)

"I am your voice. . . . Nobody knows the system better than me, which is why I alone can fix it. . . . I am the Law and Order Candidate." (convention speech, 2016)

See: For Those Who Would Be King : The Kingmaker's Playbook / Joshua Abbott